Chymaera's Overture: a Shadowed Ways novel Page 16
She went into an emotional lockdown after that; all stony shock and uncommunicative. She said nothing on the walk, nothing on the drive and nothing as they entered her home. The only thing she did under her own steam was head to her bedroom. It stunned Kai. On one hand, it could be a good sign she’d backed away from her fury. But, she’d pulled back so sharply only to seem numb, that he was pretty sure she stuffed those emotions somewhere. He was also sure they’d bubble up again, at the most inconvenient time.
Not that it mattered. They had a few hours before nightfall and they were leaving, no matter what. He used his time wisely and conferred with her parents, just to make sure everyone was on the same page. He and Chymaera would be out of contact while traveling, unless it was an emergency, and he had a satellite phone to cover that contingency. The parents had the location of, and contact information for the compound in Oregon; he made it clear to them they were welcome to come for a visit or move there-it was up to them.
While he wanted to ask them questions about Chy, he didn’t feel like he could. He didn’t think the questions he had would offer him any more insight into her nature. Anything else he needed to know he needed to have the balls to ask her directly. But there’d be time for that. He would use the various mountain ranges, forests, and desolate spots to move her through the state. They would circle, backtrack, and go slow. Hopefully, she could purge some of her anger on this trip and he could make sure no one tailed them.
He gave her a few hours of privacy and then he had to check on her, make sure she was prepared to travel. Kai was pleased when she showed him what she planned to take. There was a violin and its bow and a few mementos, pictures, and little things small enough to fit inside a keepsake box. And the bundle of wrapped photographs. Because of the size of what she called Fiddle, he offered to carry it for her, and she agreed without even the hint of disagreement. She already knew how to travel in the skin, it was an easy trick that Thumbras learned as children. However, the animal form he had chosen for cover was trickier for her to manage. Outside of emotional outbursts she had only ever transformed into anything remotely non-human looking when she was with her family or other Thumbras. And it had never been to pass as an animal. So they used her smart phone to pull up various pictures of coyotes for her to study. She fumbled the details at first, but she created a reasonable replica. The whole point was to look enough like a coyote at a distance that the normal human passerby would shrug their shoulders and continue on.
All too soon it seemed, it was time to leave. He watched Chymaera say goodbye to her parents and felt awkward, like he was spying (again) on a private moment. Not that she seemed to care at all, she had warmed up since leaving Manolo’s; however, she was not anything close to her normal self. Her parents hugged and kissed her and poured love on her, constantly telling themselves and each other that this was the best thing, the safest thing. She let them, patting their backs and murmuring it was okay. She was just going through the motions.
Then it was time for them to leave. Simon and Martine insisted on accompanying them to the ridge-line. Once there, they both transformed into their coyote bodies and ran off into the night.
21 - Let Her Go
Chymaera
Initially, I’d hated the idea of leaving, but when the time came, I was ready. I’d experienced too much loss and discovered too many lies over the past few days. Though Manolo and Alyssa may have been the last straw, their dishonesties were relatively insignificant. In the wake of Nana’s murder, it had become clear I didn’t understand all I needed to about my people. I wondered what history or information they had denied me because it would have brought up questions Duana didn’t want to answer. I mean, I was subject to a queen I knew nothing about. A queen anointed by a god no less. Or the God. Hell, my parents had never discussed spiritual beliefs except to suggest that every religion was wrong. I had assumed they were agnostic or atheists. Now it seemed like there was another possibility I hadn’t realized. That was a pretty major thing to leave out of the origin story discussions we’d had when I was a kid. It made me want to know that other group of Thumbras even though I wasn’t inclined to admit it. I wanted to learn how they differed from my little community. Most of all, I wanted to be with people who hadn’t deceived me yet.
It was difficult to pretend any hesitancy or sadness.
My parents accompanied us out to the outskirts of the canyon. We’d said our goodbyes at the house out of necessity. They’d fawned over me with hugs and kisses as if they wouldn’t see me for a century. I tried to at least fake the right level of emotional intensity, but my ministrations felt off, perfunctory. I was grateful we had to hurry apart once we reached the open. There were Guardsmen in the area, doing periodic patrols, the consensus being that there had been some kind of terrorist plot. No one knew if it was foreign or domestic. No one had claimed responsibility for the attack either. There was no knowledgeable chatter, anywhere. So the government posted men with guns everywhere to keep us safe.
Kai and I shifted forms and bled into the night. I took all the energy I didn’t care to spend on emotion and put it into transforming and maintaining my coyote body. Kai had told me I would pass, at a distance. It was odd; I had run on four legs, hooves or paws- on many occasions. However, those times had been about comfort and expediency, not forming a coherent illusion to pass human inspection. This time I had to concentrate on seeing myself as a coyote from all angles. The fur was thick, a light grayish tan tone, bordered by a reddish brown and tipped in black on my tail and ears. I kept my triangular ears high and my tail low. Most important, I followed Kai and made sure I kept up with his longer, more practiced strides.
After a while, it became easier. If it makes sense; I stopped thinking and just focused on the terrain in my sight. Maintaining the body became part of the rhythm of things. I listened to his footfalls and my own. Fluttering night birds. Skittering insects and smaller animals. Slithering snakes. There was just a sliver of moonlight to illuminate the terrain, but that was all we needed. My mind filled with tranquility in spaces I tended to jam with words. Not that there wasn’t communication, there was. It was just sparse.
When he slowed, I slowed. When he sped up, so did I. I yipped when he left me too far behind or if I wanted to check out our surroundings. He growled low and nudged my flank when he’d had enough of that and wanted to be back on our way.
We traveled that way through the night and the early parts of the following day. There were no pauses to feed or water the plants. We fed as we ran. I didn’t pay attention to the direction Kai lead us. I knew it was northerly, but not a straight line, not even close. He’d said he wanted to make sure no one followed us, and I figured he wanted time to allow me to come out of my funk as well.
During the midday hours, when we’d be most likely to encounter wayward humans, Kai located an abandoned burrow and enlarged it to accommodate us both. Shady scrub brush and boulders sheltered it, allowing us to nestle and be out of sight. We curled up together and rested. Sleep evaded me, but the dim quiet of the den becalmed me.
Sometime around dusk, Kai rose and stretched. He was still the same disciplined creature, despite the bristling gray black fur. He left the den without requesting my presence, so I lazed for a few minutes more. As I exited our sleeping chamber I saw he’d removed himself to a tree, a few yards away and sat on his haunches. It took a moment to realize he was meditating, but once I recognized that, I stared in awe. Yes, it sounds silly, but have you ever seen a coyote meditate? He was stone still as a sphinx and twice as regal. Despite my ability to quell others’ emotions, I doubted I had half as much composure as he did (on my best day). I thought, I might learn a thing or two from him. I resolved to try at least.
About an hour later, Kai got up and repeated his stretching routine. He yipped and inclined his head, and we were off again.
I enjoyed that night more than the first. It’s challenging to settle into a new form and have it become second nature to you. The first ni
ght I had concentrated on maintaining, not slipping back into my girl body. I didn’t have to be so single minded as we continued. Freed from that hyper-vigilance. I paid more attention to our surroundings, and to Kai. He was beautiful; you know, for a coyote. His representation was flawless, straight out of Animal Planet or something. I wondered what kind of life he’d had that he made such a believable wild animal. He was still screening me out of his emotions, but I’d stopped trying to read him. He came across as an upfront guy, so I figured anything he wasn’t telling me wasn’t my business. But I was curious about him. I couldn’t gauge anything about him from appearances, which was true of all Thumbras. Thumbras infer minor things about each other from scent, something like pheromones. Mature, which Kai was or immature (which technically I was). We could identify if someone carried male or female energies. That was about it, and none of that had anything to do with the form someone wore. A Thumbras’s shell didn’t have to match their core. Neither humans nor Thumbras could tell anything by sight alone.
So that night I took in all the sights and wondered about my companion. What truths could he tell me?
That night passed without a problem and again we ran and circled and ran again until the middle of the following day. Kai found us shelter, and we rested through the heat of the day. To my surprise, I dozed to the sound of buzzing insects and scuttling somethings as if it were white noise.
When I awoke, Kai was already meditating. We hadn’t spoken since we’d left my parents’ home, passing almost two full days in near silence. The break had relaxed and recharged me both. Despite that, I had questions I couldn’t phrase with a bark.
While I enjoyed my canine flesh, I couldn’t imagine speaking that way. Returning to my former body was as simple as slipping into a familiar outfit. Kai continued to find peace, or clarity, or whatever it was he was looking for, and I sat cross-legged and waited.
If it startled him to see me in human shape, he hid it well. Rising as he finished; he walked straight over and gave a little cry. Not a whine or a bark, it seemed to say “What now?”
“Look Kai, I need to speak to you, ask you some questions and I couldn’t do that as the coyote faced girl. Can we conversate?”
Kai laid down, “Of course.”
He didn’t share my reluctance at being a talking dog type thing. While it could have been ridiculous, it wasn’t.
“Okay, I have been wondering this because of everything that has happened. So, why are witches allowed to live? Aren’t they all a potential danger?”
His head jerked and his long snout almost wrinkled. Then he snorted and huffed as if dismissing the question, “Chy, we bind witches. They usually aren’t a threat to us. And, they are still human.”
“What does binding mean, anyway? Duana never used that term, she just said keep your distance from anyone that seemed ‘witchy’.”
“Bound witches have sworn fealty to our Queen. The punishment for betrayal is steep, and it is rare for anyone to risk it. Reprisals can go beyond an individual witch and affect the immediate family if not the entire coven.”
Let me tell you, arguing (I mean discussing) anything with an animal that responds to you in clear English is odd. But it was more frustrating than distracting. If it hadn’t been so important I might have shaken my head and let it go, but I didn’t understand. “So you are telling me that witches promise to be good and loyal to the Queen, but we do nothing to prevent them from doing harmful magic? We respect their promise and hold a punishment as a threat?”
“If you want to be crude, then yes.”
“So what is the punishment? What will my Grandmother’s killer face? Will she be executed, an eye for an eye style?”
“Chy, it might be a ‘he’, and no they won’t be killed. Witches are still human and that would violate our mandate. Whoever it is will be stripped. That is what we have always done to witches that have turned against us.”
It wasn’t Kai’s fault I was getting heated. He was just using terms I was unfamiliar with.
“What are you talking about? What mandate? Why can’t we go old testament when it results in a Thumbra’s death? What the hell does ‘stripped’ even mean? Do you peel the skin from their flesh because that might be a decent start!”
Somehow his doggish gaze conveyed shock and incredulity. Slowly he changed forms into a Kai that was familiar, but not quite the one I had met. Gone was the scraggly beard and kind of greasy looking hair. He looked more muscular, more a force to be reckoned with. Almost military, except for the shoulder length wavy hair. This look suited him. I realized that his switch signaled a much longer conversation.
“Our mandate Chy? It is everything, it is why were are here.”
I admit it; I smirked. I smirked in that way that kids who don’t know what the fuck they are talking about like to smirk. “Why we are where? You mean sitting in the bush?”
“No, this planet.”
He studied me in obvious consternation. I can’t imagine what he could have seen in my face. I am pretty sure it went slack, uncomprehending the total, but feeling around the edges.
“Do you know what we are Chy? And don’t tell me ‘Thumbras’. What are we in relation to this place to everything you can see, hear and feel right now?”
“Kai, what do you mean? What are you asking?” I remember the frenzy in my voice. The rising panic that my life was turning into a B movie. The need for him to just spit it out!
He sighed, such a human thing despite what he said next, “We are aliens to this world Chy. The same god that anointed our Queen sent us here.”
Fuck my life.
22 - A sorta fairytale
Kai
He had to give her credit. Considering this was the first time she’d heard the truth, she was taking it well. There was no hysteria. She wasn’t cursing him out or accusing him of lying. Nope, she was freaking out peaceably. He watched her accept his words in silence, eyes blinking a rapid SOS while her lips parted, like a fish caught on a hook. Kai frowned, he didn’t relish being the one to shed light on the lies her family had told her.
It was unfortunate, but he didn’t think she’d allow him to comfort her, so he didn’t try. Instead, he attempted to get her refocused - get her gears working again. Kai stood and offered her his hand. She looked at it, perhaps wondering “is this what an alien’s hand looks like?” “Come on Chy, let’s take a walk.” He reached for the limp appendages in her lap, caressing her fingers with his thumbs as he pulled her to her feet. “It’s okay Chy. This doesn’t change who you are.” He walked and held one hand gingerly. Physical movement seemed to normalize the most bizarre of situations. If you placed one foot in front of the other; you felt less like your world was falling apart, at least that was his experience.
“Was there anything my family didn’t lie about? All my life I kept telling myself that we weren’t that different from humans. That I was meant to have a life like my friends and now you are telling me I don’t even belong here?” Kai heard the smallness, the brokenness in her voice; he couldn’t have her thinking or feeling like that.
“Oh, Chy, that is not the takeaway you need to fixate on. First, yeah, you not knowing this sucks, and while I don’t agree with what Duana and your parents did, I kinda understand it.” Chy whirled to face him, looking stricken. Kai paused and raised his hands in a gesture of surrender. “Listen for a minute! Your first reaction when you find out we’re aliens is you don’t belong here? Well, you’re not the first. The not belonging and the wanting to go home is part of what caused a rift like hundreds of years ago. Duana apparently wanted to avoid the pain those thoughts could cause. You belong here, Chy - Earth is your home, the only one you have ever had. I can’t lie and say you will have a life just like your friends. You won’t. They will be memories, they will be dust while you are still young. You will have several lifetimes to live out every dream and desire you have. They will have one, painfully, brief existence - one where they rarely control the first fifth or the last te
nth.” Kai chuckled sardonically, “If you want to throw a pity party; it should be for the humans.”
She stared him down, not convinced. “Tell me why, why were Thumbras sent here?”
Kai resumed walking and Chy kept pace. “Well, we aren’t the only aliens here. Humans and most of the lower life forms on Earth are native. The Keros Ki, the Glossa, and various other creatures whose names you might not recognize are not. Those beings found their way to Earth to escape their own harsh realities. Dangerous worlds, lives full of kill or be killed. It makes sense they wanted this planet for themselves and were willing to exterminate humans to get it. It got ugly real quick, real fast.”
“The humans outnumbered the outsiders, but were no match for them in combat, or anything else. This was several millennia ago, so they were literally fighting with sticks and stones, when they didn’t just run away from the ‘monsters’. Our elders were sent here with one job, one mandate. Protect humans from those who are not, allow no creature to bring them harm.”
“Okay, but witches are humans, why didn’t they protect their own? And if they couldn’t, and we saved their asses, why don’t they see us as allies?”
“Chy, witches are what they are today because of us. When Thumbras first arrived, there were people called witches, but they were nothing like whoever murdered your grandmother. They were shamans, and mystics, these were humans that had the ability to comprehend the natural and supernatural world around them. They had heightened status in their tribes as they knew what was safe to eat, good for medicine, effective poisons. When to stay and when to go. When the hearts of men grew too dark, they could commune with the angels whose charge was like our own, to protect the souls of men. That said, they had limited knowledge and understanding and no actual power. If someone brought a sick child to them, they could make poultices, teas, and tinctures and hope it would be enough. They couldn’t reach within and remove the disease or reshape it.”